The Grammys happened a few days ago, and while I didn’t follow it super closely, I was curious to see who the winners were. Miley Cyrus won her first ever Grammy for her song, “Flowers.” (I am so unhip, I still have not actually listened to that song… but now I probably will.) This was a huge night for Miley, but you know what most people ended up focusing on? Making fun of her hairstyle. Now Miley is no stranger to unique fashion styles, and she frequently gets a lot of flack for it. But instead of changing herself to avoid criticism, she seems to lean even more into emphasizing her uniqueness. And you know what? I admire that.

As I began thinking about my word for 2024, and what kinds of things I wanted to accomplish this upcoming year, one word kept coming to my mind:

UNABASHED

def. “not embarrassed, disconcerted, or ashamed”
“boldly certain of one’s position”

synonyms: unapologetic, confident, proud

Merriam-Webster and Dictionary.com

I chose this word for a few reasons. Over the last year I realized that there was a big part of me that was just trying to “fit in.” I didn’t want to be different, I wanted to blend in with the crowd, and be “like everybody else.”

Isn’t that embarrassing to admit? I thought I was beyond worrying about “being cool” since I’m in my late 30s, but obviously I wasn’t!

Last year I also began noticing people who were unapologetically themselves, and they seemed so happy. It began with my son’s ballet teacher. She does cosplay, and goes ALL OUT for her costumes! It seems like every week, her hair is dyed a different color. She has anime tattoos from her favorite anime show… oh, and she also doesn’t shave her armpits, and totally does not care! After taking my son to ballet week after week, I found myself thinking, “I want to be like her.”

The last 3 years were difficult ones for me – I had been going through grief and depression over infertility, which led to me dealing with a faith crisis and a lot of anger. Honestly, I didn’t feel like myself – or maybe I had forgotten who I really was. I finally just decided I was tired of feeling that way. I wanted to do things that made me happy, and some of those things are probably “weird,” but I didn’t want to feel ashamed about that.

This year, I want to not only accept that I may be unique and weird, I want to relish in that knowledge! I want others to see me, and to be inspired to love themselves as they are.

I want my son to know he does not need to “fit in” or try to be someone he’s not. And I know the most powerful way to get that across, is to be an example of that myself.

Will I risk being made fun of or getting criticized? Of course! That’s why it’s so hard to truly embrace yourself. Some people will love you for it, and some will hate you for it. Just ask Miley 🙂